As parents we all joke about the elusive “manual” that should accompany all children when they enter this world. However, in all honesty, any manual would (based on my experience!) be useless. In less than ten seconds after the birth of my son, I quickly realized two things:
1) Any amount of instruction would be useless and
2) No two children on this planet are the same
For these two reasons I understood that we must all take it upon ourselves to learn how to be a good parent from our inner core and some major intuition.
It is frustrating, and I have certainly had my moments of weakness, but as I found myself in tears recently, I also had a beautiful awakening; I CAN do this, and do it in a way that makes both myself and my son feel happy and loved and live a fulfilling life together. Discipline is one area that is the most difficult, in my opinion, as there is no “one size fits all” solution; as my son throws a tantrum or chooses to slap me for no apparent reason it’s natural to want to react, but HOW I react is crucial.
In recent months I have done a great deal of reading on this subject, trying to find a way to communicate to my 14-month-old why it’s not ok to dramatically throw himself on the floor when he doesn’t get what he wants, or slap the boy next to him because he’s playing with a toy he wants. I don’t believe in spanking or physical punishment of any sort, and despite my quick temper I also do not believe in verbally reprimanding children out of anger. Love conquers all, and I am determined to show my son that I love him so much and am willing to go the distance to teach him right from wrong while holding his hand, not slapping it.